Day 58 A photo finish

It took a dump and a work out....


on other news spotted this morning,  Mandy singing to here self,  i'm going on holiday skinneeeee,  I love PCPeeeeeeeeee

day # 57 Weigh in day

And down another 1.4kg to 70.7.  (10.4kg and counting).  So holiday tomorrow and I really wanted to see a 6 handle on the scales before I jumped on the plane.  There's always tomorrow and true to form,  the intestines are not letting go so if I can unleash the beast within there's still hope.  I will at this stage accept slightly fudged numbers and take a post workout reading,  so I'm setting the alarm beeping early (geddit?)  so get everything done pre flight. Anyway I have consulted with Arthur Anderson accountants and apparently this is perfectly legal. This actually seems like a good move anyway because bugger having to do it when I get to hotel late arvo. .  I just wanna see a 6 Patrick.. OK, as I know you keep telling us,  NUMBERS ARE EVERYTHING.  Which moves me swiftly along to monthly stats.

                                           30th May      30th June   27th July

weight                                   82.2               75.9        71.2                (done in clothes)
body fat mass  kg                  23.8               17.3        11.5
body fat %age                       29                  22.8        16.1
Visceral fat                           129                102.8       77.9
skeletal muscle mass  kg      32.9               33           33.4


I'm stoked about these,  especially the body fat.   Muscle mass doesn't seem like its moving for the effort put in but it is what it is, it looks like more in the mirror at least.  But if you'd told me 57 days ago I could lose 10k+ I'd have laughed at you,  in fact Bill Wiswell,  ex PCPer extraordinaire  DID tell me I'd lose this much.... and I laughed at him.  To put it in perspective I ran a marathon in 05 and weighing myself right after the run I was 75.5kg,  and I used to go running for hours and hours and hours every week,  Fuck I wasted my time!


So holiday time,  57 days ago I fully intended to ditch PCP today and just go enjoy myself, but now I'm not so sure,  Bill and Jasper also told me this would happen, and I was adamant that it wouldn't, oh how naive I was.  I'm sure we wont be complete saints, as it's our holiday,  but still so much to do,  a happy balance I guess is key. Oh lord, what have I become??


BTW someone had kindly left their gym kit and towel inside the shower cubicle for me today,  but you know what I don't care,  I'm going on holiday and I'm 16.1% body fat bitches!


Finally a word about floor jumps, these things are quite possibly the hardest exercise known to man,  and we get a 15 second rest between sets????  Does anyone really only rest for 15 secs?  Having completed mine this morning and then to be in the gym at lunchtime just skipping watching Andrew Hyams bouncing around in obvious pain brought a rye smile to my face.  Sorry dude,  I felt your pain,  and laughed.

Day # 56

Conversation in the office today with an ex PCP'er

G'day Pete,  how's it going?
Not bad mate
How's your plan going,  how many days you got left?
34
Geez,  that's gone quick eh!
NO!

Day # 55 I've got a new pet hate

It's been brewing for a while but today was the straw that broke my back.  Peasants in the gym that leave their used gym kit and towels on the floor and don't put them in the wash bins.  Today I came back to my locker to find a pair of shorts where I would stand laying where they dropped, inside out with huge skids,  actually, not so much skids as anal discharge on them, FFS people where is your common sense of decency, or self respect or respect for others?  I fucking hate people and am going to live in the Outer Hebrides.

So already in a mood, I left the gym to face 3 people walking 3 abreast in the opposite direction on the path,  I moved to the side at least but 4 into 3 doesn't go and when the cunt didn't move he got it,  I'm not saying I punched him,  It was a perfectly legal move.......... in ice hockey..

Step aside people,  coops is at the end of his tether.  Bali on Thursday,  can't come soon enough!

Now Mandy,  I realise that I am leaving myself wide open to comments about the fact that I do the very same thing at home,  I apologise and will try to be tidier in future.  I do think it's a little different though as I wouldn't have a problem picking up a pair of your old cacks from the floor.

Day 54 EEEK, it's 2:15 pm and Mandy's gone..........

Shopping,  and left me charge of the kids......ON MY OWN!  May be she thinks i'm looking like a superhero or summink,  but I am still a bloke!

Day 53 Broke thru 10kg today.

But my neck is still still a big as the day I started.  It's not so much a neck as a slab to connect my head to my shoulders,  Maybe one too many times over the handle bars of my Moto-X bike back in the day?

So I've resigned myself to always being Wilfred from the Bash St Kids.

MMM, Dinner!

Day # 52 Try as she might Mandy still couldn't fit into her slim jeans

No particular Mandy,  just some Mandy from the t'internet of course!

Day # 51 I know you're desperate to know

But last night my 3 days worth of carb/protein/veg decided to make an appearance and referencing Noel's most informative chart of yesterday, which actually is however incomplete,  where is the pebble dash?  I did a #4.  and I was 0.8kg lighter this morning from yesterdays official weigh in.  It's a bit like the amazing race this, breaking 70 before the hols, bring it on!

I bumped into Andrew Hyams at the gym yesterday,  we were both there skipping and squatting and floor jumpin.  I took some video of us http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qDsLZmGBdt8  starts at 3:30 and basically 4:56 is how I felt at the end!

Day # 50 A millstone or a milestone?

It's also weigh in day,  and yet again,  my body decides to play it's funny trick on me and not let me poo since Sunday,  So as much as I've dropped some good weight this week  1.4kg to 72.1 (9kg in total) if I'd dropped what's stuck inside me it would have been more.  So....2.1kg to break the magic number in one week before we go on holiday.  Next tuesday I shall be incorporating laxative into my daily diet.  So much for the food in poo out theory.

Now onto my diet, I think I'm being singled out by Patrick, unfairly I might add.  I can only comment within my own group but my food is WAY lower than everybody else's and I can't understand the logic.  I'm 38% lower on carb from breakfast on the other guys in the group,  which is fine if I'm 38% lower than them weight wise,  but I'm also 18% lower carb than the women and thats where this theory breaks down,  Mandy is feeling sorry for me even,  and trust me,  after yesterdays blog (before she removed it) that is amazing.  So what am I doing wrong?  Is is posting pictures of naked women on my blog you think?  Is there anyone out there on less than 50g carb for breakfast?  I've been happily having a pita bread stuffed with peppers with ground pepper for weeks,  which I think is the reason we're not allowed to drink because there's no way I could say that pissed.  But now 1 pita bread is tooooooooo much.  harumph.

Day49 Redux Due to technical issues my previous post has disappeared!

Any similarity between that image and any person alive or otherwise is purely coincidental. No one would ever eat that much corn on the cob!

Day 47 Did anyone happen to watch MotoGP this evening?

That is racing!

Does anyone happen to know if there's been a more boring blog on the PCP website?

Day # 46 Valentino Rossi day

I'm not as skinny or as fast as him but my farts do sound a bit like a Ducati!

Day # 45 A few of us are struggling with the eggs in our diet........

So I got in touch with an old friend at the egg marketing board and he rustled up this promotional video for y'all to get your teeth into.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GNndX9qua1o

I love you eggs!

Day # 44 Does my ear canal look big in these?

I seem to have lost weight in my left ear as my headphone keeps falling out,  where it used to be tight.

Who'd have thunk it!

Day # 43 Weekly weigh in.

Targets, targets, targets. Almost at day 45,  which now I'm in the 40's doesn't really seem like too much of a milestone to me,  I think 50 is more relevant,  60 will be awesome. That then is the begging on the home straight in my opinion.  As for weight, 73.5kg this morning,  down 7.6kg,  only 900g this week. Seems ridiculous to say but I feel like I'm having a fat day today though,  think I'm a bit backed up if you know what I mean. Even so,  the weight is not moving fast enough to get through 70kg before I go on holiday on the 28th,  so lets make it a 10kg loss, 71.1kg before I go on holiday,  still not a given but more doable.  If I could skip more I think I would have a chance, but friggin achilles still troubling me,  tried yesterday for first time since Thursday and still not ready to go back...  fack fack fack.  Still I am enjoying my bike rides so not all bad I suppose.

So we get AS MUCH AS YOU WANT veggies for lunch.  Is this to test our resolve?  Not sure I really need the extra,  but knowing that I can, is it going to make me weak?  I am hoping we've now seen the end of the reduced weekly diet though,  I don't think I could go much lower,  mind you've I've been saying that since day  1 so who knows.

On a positive note, Mandy bought a bikini for our hols yesterday and she looks smoking in it.  On a negative note her brother has just sent us these through the post.

What a total fucker!  Ostensibly they are for Alex's birthday present,  but even so, they're in the house and as we ration the kids access to chocolate, they're going to be around for a bleedin' long time!

Day #42 I really have nothing to say today

So I'm just going to post a picture of Homer I found on the www

Doh!

Day # 41 The real reason to do PCP

There's a guy in my office that for several years (well forever really) has weighed less than me,  the spread was once about 7kg, it's been as wide as 13kg and when I started PCP it was about 10kg.  Just once,  just once in my life I've wanted to weigh less than him,  it's been an ongoing joke and bone of contention.  Well today my friends we jumped on the scales and we weighed.....drum roll..............  exactly the same.  So not quite there,  but that is just a matter of time.  He had a fat weekend apparently so it might not be tomorrow,  but it will happen.

Then I shall call him a fat ****

day 40 "Forgive me father for I have sinned"

We found ourselves in Pizza Express with the kids today.  Now I have NEVER been in or ordered from Pizza Express and not had an American Hot, it's just the law.  sooooooooooooooooo

I had a friggin salad,  it did have goats cheese in it which isn't strictly PCP but hey hoo,  not like I've done it before.  But then came the kids desserts that came with their meal.  Sam had nutella with dough balls,  Alex vanilla Ice cream.  I though it might be nice for Alex to have some nutella in his ice cream,  he disagreed so I scooped it out on a tea spoon,  Didn't really have anywhere to put it and whilst Mandy was looking for a tissue it sort of fell,  ney jumped into my mouth, clean spoon, problem solved.  I should have been an engineer.  Then my coffee turned up with a piece of biscotti on the side,  well apparently this was the long lost brother of the nutella and ice cream teaspoon,  they had to reunited, as did the last dough ball on Sam's plate.  They say these sins come in threes.

Day 39 Yesterday I had another case of the Fridays!

Day 38 was officially Pissy Condition Project

That's the 2nd Friday on the bounce I've felt like shite, waddupwiddat? I was knackered, hungry, my muscles ached, at work for no obvious reason my extremities were freezing cold, I now know what its like to be an old person, nothing I could do would get my fingers or toes warm. I took to holding a boiling kettle ffs, thought I was in a Japanese game show. I'm nursing an achilles twinge, which if truth be told is probably self Inflicted through overskipping. That is getting slowly worse so I have to ease off that for a few days and go do something less boring instead....sitting at home watch tv?

The only good thing was Mandy was struggling too, is that a good thing? But misery loves company as they say. After much procrastination we finally did our exercises last night together.  Really happy I did now as the fog lifted a bit,  no skips or floor jumps though. I went out on my mountain bike this morning which is the first time since PCP and actually it was great, made a nice change. And after a brief watch of the tour de France and seeing what those guys have to get out of bed every day to do, well this ain't too bad eh.? eh? EH?

Mentally something has switched in my head as well,  I've gone from,  wow look how much weight I've lost to,  Christ,  I've lost 7kg and I've still got a shit load more to go,  How the hell did I let myself get to that point in the first place?


All in all a very strange day,  I was so genki on Thursday too,  so here's hoping that was a low point not to be revisited.



On another point,  I just split a packet of Lays crisps into bowls for the kids.  How friggin greasy are they?????  I had no idea, I had to wash my hands.  Mandy and I could polish off one of the biiiiig packets of those between us of an evening.  Makes you think!

Day # 38 Going Dutch

So for our evening snack it would appear I'm being served up a pair of Mandy's clogs to munch on.

Well I suppose wood is a vegetable after all!

Day #37 Team Puck Post PCP celebratory meal!

day #36 scales playing silly buggers today

I know they're a bit temperamental but today each time I stood on them they decided to give me a different reading.  Seemed to make a difference if I was facing north or not,  maybe it's my natural magnetism?

Anyway I settled on 74.4 which is down 900g on the week which is 6.7kg total,  but I could be misreading it and I'm actually fatter,  who knows...

Tried the abs video this morning,  for the time being I'm going to call it the 3 minute abs!

Day # 35 How to make time stand still!

At the equator, the time zones are a little over 1,000 miles apart, so to cross one every hour, you could fly a plane west at a little over 1,000 miles per hour

If you started flying at 12:00 noon, at 1:00 p.m. (according to your watch) you would cross a time zone, making it 12:00 noon again. This process would continue for as long as your plane could stay in the air: As soon as your watch passed 12:59, you'd have to turn it back to 12:00 again. For your entire westward trip around the Earth, the time would be between 12:00 noon and 1:00 p.m.

Alternatively you could do a plank!

Day # 34 The return of the smug c**t!

Firstly,  a little clarification on the skipping "liberation".  I was getting so hung up on the counting...  it was all about getting to 100...200...300 that I'd trip at 102 or 203 etc.  And as I would get to the century turns I'd start questioning myself....  was that coming up to 400 or have I already done 400 and that's actually 500???  Umm, not sure better make it 400 to be sure eh....trip....  like patting your head and rubbing your belly at the same time,  all far too taxing.  Hence my suggestion,  and I've found now I'm listening to music, skipping is very much like dancing,  and back in the day when I used to go raving I could dance for 10 hrs straight,  and I was skinny,  so fuck skipping,  just go to Ibiza for 2 weeks!  I am still tripping btw, a lot,  just not in the raving sense of the word.

Some other snippets of smugcuntyness

1/ Mandy made the kids a banana split last night for dessert, and not only did she lick the ice cream spoon...  she ate a freaking chocolate coin too!  I didn't.

2/ I did my first proper full pull up today!

3/ I tinned a load of jeans last night that don't fit and nor do I ever intend them too again!

4/  #2 is a lie,   I did 3!

Noel,  no hard feelings,  I think it's just the woman inside me.  Pre PCP I had beer and tits,  Now I don't have beer and PMT!

Day 32 Love Kylie

I have to say, my whole Psyche since day 1 of PCP has been so geared to breaking that first month milestone that I'm now struggling to get re motivated for the next-two-long-months.   But we went to see Kylie in concert last night (4th row) and it was brilliant.  Backing singer Roxy was beautiful,  had to keep reminding myself it was Kylie we went to see (oh what could have been if I'd done PCP years ago!).  But anyway the dancers had all clearly been doing PCP and finished with honours,  Just thought, WOW,  that's the target, best get a couple of extra push-ups done tomorrow.

For some reason, the mainly male audience surrounding us seemed to whoop n holler more the less clothes the male dancers wore, confusing!

day 31 I found footage of Noel trying to skip

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9TkCpFCkFnE